7:00 AM: Wake up to baby lightly slapping you in the face.
7:05-7:20 AM: Change and dress baby. Give bottle. If your my daughter, your 10 months old and so spoiled that you STILL will not (she can, but doesn’t) because you know mommy will hold it for you. Get baby situated in living room with Sesame Street and toys. Put up baby gates.
7:21 AM: Head to kitchen for much needed coffee.
7:22 AM: Go to back porch for morning cigarette (I know, I know, it’s bad for me.)
7:23 AM: Head in when baby starts screaming and crying. Put out cigarette that you barely smoked.Gulp as much coffee as you can between the walk from the door back to the living room.
7:24 AM Pick up baby. Make baby happy
7:26 AM-8:00-AM Start cooking breakfast.Prop baby girl in high chair with Gerber biscuits while I cook. Make her’s first. Cut everything up into tiny bits. Give DD her breakfast and start to cook my own. Finish and sit down at table next to baby to eat. Baby is done with her breakfast by this time and wants out. Break out the highchair toys, and try to eat as much as you can in the five minutes before she demands to get out. Finish about half of your breakfast.
8:00-10:00AM Chase speed-crawling baby throughout house. Vaccuum for the first time of the day, since baby puts EVERYTHING they can find in their mouths, and that’s all babygirl wants to do is be on the move on the floor.
10:00AM: Give DD a small snack and a bottle. Read a story, Play with toys, Generally try to tire her out a bit. Finally check voicemails from the previous night. Attempt to open e-mail. Run to catch baby before they pull that cord out from behind the television stand, again.
10:30-11AM. Try to put baby to sleep for a nap. Go through the entire routine. Diaper change, songs, comfy blankie, give her a toy to hold while she has her bottle, etc. Spend at least a half hour doing this. Repeat that it’s naptime at least ten times.
11:01 AM Finally creep out of the room and attempt to get as much done as possible in this glorious slot of free time you’ve finally obtained. But first, back to that cigarette and that coffee!
11:10AM Barely finish the coffee before the monitor goes off.
11:11AM Pray that she was just stirring about and goes back to sleep.
11:12 AM Sigh deeply and go retrieve your very awake baby.
11:30-2 PM: Run errands. (Thankfully DD loves being out and about, so errand-time is a breeze!) Lunch is also on this agenda, somewhere in the noon hour. If we’re out to lunch it goes rather smoothly, if we’re not you can refer back to breakfast time, and just imagine a general replay of that only with different food.
2:00-3:00 Playtime with baby.
3:00 Naptime. Spend 10-15 minutes getting baby to sleep. Nervously wait for the next five minutes. When she hasnt awoke, spend the next.. however long you have, frantically trying to get as much done as possible.
Somewhere between 330-4 and about halfway done with your to do list :
Baby’s awake. Repeat chasing her throughout the house, keeping her entertained and listening to Caillou.
5:00pm Start preparing dinner. Lately this has been anything that I can bake in the oven for up to an hour. DD starts whining halfway through. Stop, and spend another ten minutes tending to your childs needs. Go back to prepping dinner.
6:00pm-6:30 pmFeed baby and eat dinner yourself.
6:30-7 Baby bath time.
7-745: Get baby to bed.
8-930 PM Housework.
9:30-10PM Pinterest, Facebook, Twitter, Blogging. 😉
10PM. Fall asleep. Immediately. The moment your head hits the pillow.
1AM: Baby’s awake.
330AM Baby’s awake.
5AM: Baby’s awake. (She’s teething.)
7 AM: Start your day all over again. Where’s that coffee and smoke?! 😉